wow where do i start...i feel pretty content with my life right now i have about a million things going on but over all im happy with where i am. sure i would still change somethings and others confuse the crap out of me but i know its all stuff God will show me in time. so lately i have come to term with goodbyes learned to say hello again and got a relaity check about who and what in my life is important. someone told me recently that ive become brutaly honest, the fact is ive always been brutaly honest im just not always heard, it use to take me alot longer to tell someone how i felt and lately it doesnt take as long. myabe i am being mean or maybe im just tired of being told what everyone thinks. congradualations you all have an opinion about my life well guess what so does everyone else. i mean i apprieiate that everyone cares enough to tell me what they think but when it comes down to it its my life and this is between me and God what i do. life recently has been very crazy but so much fun i have two jobs, i go to school and im involved in more stuff at church than ever but i love every single bit of it...okay maybe not school so much but ive realized as far as that goes i dont care if it takes me 12years im not going to over load. so if i have to take one class at a time then thats what ill do. i want my degree but school has never been my thing. ive also had such a renewing of passion for the kids i work with and charity work, ive spent so long running from it because it wasnt a stable job or career field but who cares, God gave me a passion for it for a reason and im secure in Him so im secure in my future job. as far as the romantic part of my life i truly dont care honestly about any of it. and im sure most people think im lieing when i say that and maybe i am and dont know it but im really just at a place where im having fun and enjoying great friends having fun growing closer to God and not worrying about the future. im not ready for that so why should i worry about it now. there are of course tons of things i would fix if i could but i know God has the best in mind for me and even things i dont understand work together for the good of all. so as i approuch my 20th birthday and say goodbye to my teen age years i go into the next chapter of my life with a new apprietation for the simple noncomplicated parts of life and a wisdom that as come from years of mistakes. so whatever God has in store for the next chapter i move confidently towards becuase i know He has it all under control if i will just listen and follow. ive always valued submission in women when it comes to there husbands but i heard someone say sunday how can you submit to your husband if you cant submit to God. so in preperation for that part of my life and because He is the true love of my life i happily submit to his athouity even if i dont always understand it.